CFL Devotion November 9 - Michael and Me

"People sit around the table and pray - and that's beautiful, but to DO something is the thing, you have to ACT."   


These words of Michael's have been haunting me lately.  I have been wondering what it is I am supposed to be doing.  What is the point of this journey I am on?  Am I meant to be spending my time on line looking at pictures of Michael, watching videos of him, missing him, talking about him, demanding justice for him?  Or is there more?  Yesterday I found myself, for the first time, wondering if I should go back to being "normal".  It seemed to me that I was kidding myself, maybe making this whole connection with Michael up.  Is he really still around?  Looking around the world, it seems that nothing is getting any better.  I have become so sensitive to the pain, that I can not even watch a bit of news, or a program about animals without it affecting me for days.  Seeing a mother yelling at her children in the market makes me fight back tears.  What is going on?  I never used to be this way.  I had been living in my own little world, maybe a little bored, but content.  Now the weight of the world is on my shoulders and it is just too much!  Better to go back to the way I was before I met Michael.


Luckily, I talked to my beautiful friend, Siren, about my feelings, and she immediately understood and talked to me, without any judgement, only love and understanding, as well as total confidence that we are not making this up, and there is a perfect plan that is unfolding.   Earlier, I had read Heaven's latest post on her HeavenLeigh Thoughts blog, and I went back to read it again.  This is the part that stood out for me:
 I have transformed to a place where you miss me, yet I am embedded in your thoughts and movements in a new and spectacular way. Fusion of spirit...no time...no separation. In a way it seems I am not with you, for I am now in you. 


In thinking about this as a message from Michael, (although Heaven does not say it is), everything suddenly became much clearer to me.  On that day in 2009 when I was "struck" by Michael's love, could it have been a merging of souls?  I became bigger, because a part of him was now a part of me, and he became bigger because I had become an extention of his love.  This would explain the change in how I viewed the world.  It was almost like I was seeing it from his eyes, and my continuing and growing compassion and love for all people, animals and the earth seem to be more typical of Michael, than the me I used to be.  If you multiply this by the number of people who have been affected by Michael, it would seem that we really are one, and he is here, through us.  Instead of waiting for Michael to let me know he is here, asking him what to do, needing him to take care of me, wanting the physical Michael back, although I never knew him then, this new perspective gives me the confidence and determination to BE what Michael would have me be.  I will know what that is, because he is now creating his dreams, with me, through me, as me.   It has been happening for two and a half years already, I just didn't know it.  My little book, Ever After, is a creation of Michael's and mine, together, as a gift to the world.  Neither one of us could have done it without the other.  My thinking has been much too small, and now I feel that a whole new way of thinking has opened up for me to grow, to be who I really am, to share the truth of Michael with whoever may be listening.  This does not mean that I won't be loving pictures and videos and music of Michael's, because his energy is still there for us, but I won't be thinking he is separate from me anymore.  And I definitely don't want to go back to being "normal"

Call for Love Devotion November 2 - Immortal

On November 4, 2010 I bought tickets for my husband, my daughter and myself to see the Immortal Tour show.  Last night was the day I had been waiting for, for three days less than a year.  I am not going to describe the show here, as I am sure many of you will be seeing it soon.

As I was sitting in my seat, in a city three hours from my home, I was looking around at the people and wondering how many of them were discovering Michael for the first time, right at that moment.  There had to be at least a few.  How could anyone hear that voice, that message, that creative genius with the heart of an angel and love for every life on the planet, and not be affected.  Personally, I was overwhelmed by the respect and love that was being shown to Michael.  It was not only about the music, but great care was taken to show the heart of the man who graced us by giving us everything he had, for 40+ years.  Being Canadian, I am a great fan of all Cirque du Soleil productions, and I am proud that their genius combined with Michael's genius to create such a spectacular tribute that will last forever.

It was beautiful, magical, incredible, and it made me love him even more.  I read a quote that was one of many in the giant program.
  "Since we are given the gift of life, it should be our persistent endeavor to immortalize ourselves no matter what field of endeavor we choose."  Michael Jackson.
Then I remembered,  that is what it's all about.  Michael's dream is coming true with the creation of this tour.  The Immortal Tour.

Call for Love Devotion October 26 - Perseverance

The word Perseverance has always seemed a bit negative to me.  It sounds like working hard fighting an uphill battle.  It seems like struggling against the flow.  Perseverance does not sound joyful.  To do this devotion I had to resort to looking up a definition of perseverance.  This is what I found

Steady persistence in adhering to a course of action, a belief, or a purpose; steadfastness.

Wow!  That sounds like dedication, devotion, determination, all words that I feel strongly about, especially when it comes to Michael.  It also sounds like the way Michael lived every minute of his life.    Has there ever been anyone who has shown more steady persistence in adhering to a course of action, a belief, and a purpose?  Maybe perseverance is something worth looking at again.

Every single witness in this trial is expressing love for Michael.  Saying how amazing he was, a genius, the best father ever, the kindest, most loving person. It is wonderful to see such love for him expressed by those who knew him, and also those who barely knew him.  Is Michael there?  Do they feel his presence when they are testifying?  Is our Call for Love working?  Is the whole world going to see the true Michael after this?  I am asking a lot of questions these days.

When I have time to watch the trial, I find it to be very encouraging.  The judge seems to be very fair, the prosecution lawyers are clear, direct, easy to follow.  The defence seems lost and disorganized.  The witnesses are painting a picture of the events and more importantly to me, they are showing who Michael was.  There can be no satisfaction for any of us in a conviction, other than the knowledge that a dangerous doctor can not harm anyone else.  Nothing will reverse the insanity of the situation that occurred.  The fear of Michael's name being dragged through the mud, has not materialized.  He has been recognized as the victim here, and the judge has not allowed any other distractions to be allowed into evidence.

Still, it can be very depressing.  Sometimes I feel like there is no hope for the world.  There just seems to be too much that needs to be done, too much anger, hatred, cruelty.  I feel like giving up.
If I just watch the news, or anything on TV, I find it dragging me down, sapping my energy.  Today I heard about shark fin soup, and how they get the fins, and my day was ruined.  I could only think about all the sharks, dolphins, whales, seals, and endless other animals that are suffering under human hands.  It was too much for me to bear.  How can we possibly turn it all around?

Then it was time for the Major Love Prayer.  I saw myself in the courtroom, looking at the jury, the judge, the lawyers, the defendant.  I actually saw myself walk over and kiss CM on the head.  (This was quite a shock to me)   The room filled up with white light, shooting up from the floor, spreading all through the courthouse, up to the sky and out like a ripple around the building in all directions, flowing out across the country, the oceans, spreading all around the world.  I felt myself holding hands with others in a circle around the globe.  I heard Michael singing the words, all around the world, all around the world, all around the world.

Steady persistence in adhering to a course of action, a belief, or a purpose; steadfastness.

Maybe there is hope.  When I think of Michael's children, and the strength and character they demonstrate, it gives me back my determination to persevere, not in an uphill battle, but with the flow of LOVE that they, and all of us, have learned from their father's example.

Call for Love Devotion October 19 - Faith of a Mustard Seed

When I was a child, I remember hearing this quote from Jesus (I don't know where I heard it, because we did not go to any church)  and I was amazed to think that nothing will be impossible for me.  I just had to figure out how a mustard seed had faith.  To me it seemed like a mustard seed didn't do anything at all, it was a mustard seed, and if you planted it, it would presumable grow into a mustard plant.   What did that have to do with faith?

As I grew up, I realized that there were many things that were impossible.  I only had to be realistic to see that.  It has been Michael who has shown me in the last two years, that it is true, nothing is impossible, for someone who has faith.   Now I have a small idea of what the faith of a mustard seed is.  I did have it right when I was a child, the mustard seed doesn't do anything!  The mustard seed is being a mustard seed.  There is nothing it needs to know about water, sun, sprouting, leaves, mustard, or anything else.  It only needs to be, and to allow it's own nature to be brought forth.  So it is with us, there is so little we understand, even about how our own bodies work, (does anyone know how we keep breathing, heal a cut, create a baby, think, beat our hearts?)  we really must let go of the idea that we are in control of anything at all.  We only need to be, and allow our own nature to be brought forth.

I know that we are a bit more complex than a mustard seed, but the basic truth remains.  To allow our own nature to be brought forth, we only need to do what Michael did, which was to say yes to his heart and follow his joy.  If a little mustard seed is guaranteed to become what it is meant to become, with only a bit of nurturing, would the universe have planned anything less for us?  If you love singing and dancing, then sing and dance.  If you love animals, be with animals.  If you love drawing, writing, reading, cleaning, cooking, then do it.  Nurture yourself.  All else will fall into place.  And nothing will be impossible for you.

She (his mother) taught me that my talent for singing and dancing was as much God's work

as a beautiful sunset or a storm that left snow for children to play in.   MICHAEL JACKSON

Call for Love Devotion October 12 - Miracles

There are two ways to live your life,

One is as though nothing is a miracle.

The other is as though everything is a miracle.

Albert Einstein 

I can only believe that this trial is a miracle.  The true Michael is being revealed beyond a doubt.  The true Michael is not what substance was in his body or how it got there.  The true Michael was not on that gurney or autopsy table.  What is important is not the physical side of life, it is the love that is not visible, but can change lives in an instant.  What is important is the selfless message of love that will be carried on and continue to change lives forever as a result of one man's devotion to mankind. Our bodies are temporary, as hard as that is for us to believe, and as much as we don't want it to be true.
We can not have the physical Michael back, but this trial is an opportunity for more people to be awakened to the true Michael and the truth within themselves.  And that is a miracle.

The way I know this is because I believe in miracles, and a miracle has happened to me.  It was not the physical Michael that woke me up to the miracle of life.  It was the Michael that lives on forever, as real as he was when he was in a body.  This Michael is pain free, happy, able to make a huge difference to all of us as he always wanted to do.  This Michael can sing, dance, never needs to sleep, and can not be hurt by unkindness.  He is here to help us in our time of need.  He is here to help us get through this trial.  He is here to show us a bigger picture that is much more beautiful than we could ever have imagined.  Let's let him help us to make his dreams come true.

MICHAEL THE MACHINE

Michael learned at an early age that his personal needs were secondary to those of the family and the show.  Being tired, hungry, sad, lonely was not as important as performing and meeting obligations.  When he was old enough to make his own decisions, he continued to follow this habit.  This was part of the reason that he was able to express so much of his potential as an entertainer.  He did not let his own personal comfort interfere with his practice schedule or creative endeavors.   As much as this became part of who Michael was, it cost him dearly.

When the bridge collapsed during a show, injuring Michael in the fall, he continued to sing and finish the concert.  When asked how and why he did it, he answered that he heard his father’s voice telling him that the show must go on, don’t disappoint the fans. 

His motivation was not money, other than as a means to fulfill his REAL work, which was to help children in need.   The This Is It concerts were no different.  His desire to help the children of the world by building a hospital which would heal the underlying need of making them feel loved and valued for who they are, kept him going even when his body was exhausted and his mind wouldn’t stop long enough to let him sleep.  

Many people who “handled” Michael, as well as Michael himself, saw his body as a machine.  They did whatever was necessary to keep the machine going, without care for the person inside that machine.  Michael did it selflessly, the others did it selfishly. 

As a result, we have lost the physical Michael, the wonderful talented loving man that was with us for most of our lives.  What can we do now to ease the pain of the loss, other than to do whatever we can to bring about the dreams and wishes he expressed.  Let’s not let him down.

Making Magic and Hope for the Future

Michael Jackson THE IMMORTAL World Tour Footage

www.youtube.com

This week marked the premiere of the Cirque du Soleil - Immortal World Tour in Montreal.  Another one of Michael's dreams can be checked off the list.  He loved watching Cirque shows, and talked to John Branca in the weeks before his death about his dream of having a Michael Jackson Cirque production.  These shows combine the magic of illusion, with storytelling, artistic abilities and unbelievable feats of daring, strength and imagination.   The incredible music and dancing, combined with the unique 3D circus-like performance makes for a memory that lasts a lifetime.  These are magical productions that children and adults can appreciate and enjoy together.  I feel Michael spinning with delight at the launching of the Immortal World Tour in his honor.  As with all of Michael's tours, music, short films and everything else he did, the purpose is not solely entertainment.  The underlying purpose is to Heal the World.   With families spending time together, the suspension of reality, the possibilities opening people's minds, these shows will bring the truth of Michael to a whole new set of people who may not have realized who he was when he was here.   I hope my husband and daughter will be two those people when we go to the show on November 1.   I imagine my 14 year old realizing that anything is possible when you believe in yourself.  I imagine my husband thinking "maybe there is more to Michael Jackson than I previously thought."  I imagine people who see this show, feeling for some unexplainable reason that their dreams can come true too.  That is the Magic of Michael and the Hope for the Future.